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Mini Relationship Tip: Get Lit.



I’ve found that one of the hidden blocks to our personal power and joy as women is our competition with other women, whether overt or unspoken.

A unique way to turn this around and have way more access to your own lit-up power, came from Dolores (an alias!), a reader of my Love 3.0 website:

“dear liyana,

i just read your (long) bio

AMAZING

you are AMAZING

i had to stop comparing myself,
because that’s silly. I would rather just
be lit with the inspiration of who you are.”

Is THIS woman amazing or what?

I’m not saying that she’s amazing because she’s ladling praise on me. While that’s something I appreciate, what catches my eye is that she didn’t let herself get taken down by comparison. She turned it around. She got lit up with inspiration to light up herself.

THAT is a sign of a powerful woman.

As I said earlier, I’ve found that one of the hidden blocks to our personal power and joy as women is our competition with other women, whether overt or unspoken.

It’s been a long time (more than 5,000 years or so) during which men have held the key to the resources. Big time resources. Food. Shelter. A place in the community. Care for our children… It’s only been a short amount of time, not even a couple hundred years, since women are no longer really dependent on men, at least in most of the western world. But our bodies and brains are going on over 5,000 years of “reality” rather than the last few hundred.

For 5,000 years and more our cells and brains have been bathed in life-or-death competition – and that doesn’t just melt away with a paltry few hundred years and a handful of few generations. There are parts of our brains (not the rational parts) that simply laugh at the freedom and equality available to us over the last 200, 100 or 50 years. It’s extraordinary, unprecedented, but also painfully recent to our cellular memory. We can’t blame ourselves for having DNA that instructs us to beat out the other woman so we can stay alive, fed, clothed, housed, and our children looked out for as well.

So, this week, Get Lit.

Notice that woman (or women) in your life you compare yourself to. Maybe you feel envious of her, jealous of her, that she doesn’t deserve what she has or is, or that she’s more than you’ll ever be.

Rather than having it take you down, use the thing you are comparing to get inspired. Rather than seeing her as a threat, notice how you can see her as an inspiration, pointing the way for you to step into an aspect of yourself – your own unique, radiantly lit-up expression of Woman.

Allow her to be the spark that ignites you and sets you aflame. Get Lit.

The ability to empower others, while empowering ourselves, is a sign of true power.

And don’t forget to leave me your comments – there’s a link just under the title of this Mini Relationship Tip!

Enjoy, LiYana

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